went over to visit my aunt's family to see how they were coping with the loss!!

it felt good to see all of them!!

yet i felt sad when i saw them!!

it felt good to talk to my uncle about life n such!

but it was difficult seeing him trying to put on a strong front so that we dont worry too much about him!!

it felt good to see my lil cousins smiling!!

but it was painful knowing that they're crying behind that smile!!

FUCK YOU CANCER!! SERIOUSLY!!

IF YOU HAD A MOM ILL FUCK HER TOO!!

i definitely need perseverance!!

damn!

ive been too caught up with the shit that has been sending seismic waves through my life that ive forgotten the importance of this blog!!

its exactly like what November said other than the fact that its gives him strength cause it actually GIVES ME THE STRENGTH!!

it puts my mind in place!

it gives me a focus!

it gives my brain enough stimulus to keep dementia at bay(for now!!)

Fuck i needed this damn post badly man!!

Ive lost yet another loved one to cancer!!!

yeah FUCK that shit!

Life is never easy!

even if you're a rich ass

or smart a ass

or just a blonde ass!!

oh wait sorry, the blonde's life is pretty easy!!

just spreading the legs!!

but the point here is that what does not kill us will make us stronger!

So when the going gets tough, the tough gets going!

cant think of anymore cliches already!

fuck!

a good man becomes great because he knows when to pull up his socks n also when to pull down his pants!!

the last couple of days have been really rocky!

it has me feeling on the edge all the time!

like im gonna just erupt anytime!

Optical 88 is really really getting on my nerves!

fucking incapable management!!!

I dont take disrespect lightly!!

Im on the verge of losing yet another loved one to cancer!

Fuck this shit man!!

A fresh new start!!

not one that im totally happy to embark on.

nevertheless i still have to look forward!

i lost a girlfriend BUT found a new best friend (that sounds utterly gay & 'secondary school')

there is something else i learnt from this whole ordeal!

and that is im NUMB!!

i dont feel pain anymore!

i think ive lost it!

ive became a heartless creature!!

i sat in the ward talking to my aunt who probably has weeks to live and yet i could not feel a thing!

too much has happened in life that ive become a ZOMBIE!!!

anyone's mom a ZOMBIE??!!